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Spotted Lanternflies Reach Quorum in Record Time

The cedar outside of the GIAC• At 2:00 PM on Sunday, November 3rd, Haverford’s rapidly growing contingency of Spotted Lanternfly gathered for their annual Fall plenary. Reaching quorum in a record 13 minutes, the Lanternfly Council wasted no time, immediately beginning a discussion that would leave the tree buzzing for hours. The afternoon was opened with a speech by jSAP co-heads, who announced that, although ratification of the sap policy would be pushed to the Spring, they would like to encourage the body to continue to consume responsibly for the rest of their life-cycle. After several hours of discussion, a few key measures were put to a vote. One major proposal was met with a flurry of red underwings; the Lanternfly body passed a friendly amendment to the Honor Code abolishing the entire arboretum. An effort to disinvest in shoe-manufacturers was quashed in a landslide vote, reflecting general anxieties about balancing the college’s budget. Unfortunately, quorum was lost when a Haverford student crushed 12 lanternflies with their shoe.

Illustration by Sarah Jesup ‘20

If you see Spotted Lanternflies forming quorum, it’s imperative to immediately report it online or via phone by calling 1-888-4BADFLY.

What else? Kill it! Squash it, smash it…just get rid of it. In the fall, these bugs will lay egg masses with 30-50 eggs each. These are called bad bugs for a reason, don’t let them take over your college next.

Via the Pennsylvania Dept. of Agriculture

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